It is that time of the year when some time is dedicated to a campaign shedding light on the horror that destroys our lives.
I have nothing eating disordered to report. I have not thrown up since early December. I have not really restricted. None of this means that I don’t look at myself and shudder. I have that permanent, creeping revulsion when I see my body. It radiates through me, out of me and consumes me like the calories I stare at with love and fear. It may be in whatever version of remission this is, until my kidneys recover and I snap. Until then, be strong my darlings. Fight the good fight and never give up. You are worth so much more than this living hell.