Work Out

I finally went back to gym today.

After nearly 4 weeks of being depressed and unmotivated, I dragged myself there and it felt good. I sweated and exercised long past the burn. I remembered endorphins and exhaustion and how satisfying it is to pound my anxiety away. Sadly, last night I caught my reflection whilst wearing a bikini. The extra girth and heaviness and cellulite was upsetting. I think I haven’t fully acknowledged how much size I have gained in the past 2 months. I am not brave enough yet to weigh myself.

I did however, come home, eat dinner, purge it, eat second dinner with my boyfriend and purge that too. Everything else today was coffee and celery. I feel like I am back on track.

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5 thoughts on “Work Out

  1. What do you mean by purge, exactly? I really hope you are building healthy habits. If you need an online friend/motivator I’m here.

  2. :[ I hate societal pressures of bathing suits

  3. Grainne says:

    I went to the beach not too long ago for the first time in a long while. I put on a bikini and then nearly didn’t go. Found a two piece that would serve a granny well (covered me from arse to neck) and wore that instead but still didn’t take off my wrap. I hear you. Xx

  4. fix your hypothyroid. take natural pork thyroid. synthetis crap doesn’t work for most. take adrenal support stuff. instead of puking, take psyllium caps with your meals.

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