I rolled out of bed this morning. I had to roll because I had eaten an entire large pizza last night and DID NOT purge. I had an emotional upset (EU) – involving a man – what’s new? So in all my wisdom at midnight I had pizza sent to my hotel room after eating a whole bag of trail mix. I wolfed it down and then decided that I would be just as fat today whether I purged or not.
I am terrified of the damage I have done. I am terrified of my lapse in habit. I always, always purge.
So now that I have confessed my sins, I am on penance (liquid fasting) for the next two days to make up for it. I am disgusted with myself and by the fat freak staring back at me in the mirror. I don’t recognize her. I refuse to be her.
Fat Ballerina 
Been there, many times.
I love you. Thanks for the notes.
Thanks for the solidarity. Hope you are alright. Keep me posted. xo
Ah, this hits close to home. Your writing is engaging and witty …. glad I happened upon your blog!
Thanks! I’d love to hear your story sometime.
Hey! Sorry about the heart- trouble, it’s terrible at its most hurtful. About the food: accepting that you will lapse by eating too much, will make it easier to not do that, in the future:)
This article is about smoking, but the same principle also applies to other impulse-related problems : http://m.everydayhealth.com/stop-smoking/lapse-while-quitting-smoking